{"id":2329,"date":"2015-05-01T14:40:48","date_gmt":"2015-05-01T19:40:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.hectic-dad.com\/hectic-dad\/?p=2329"},"modified":"2015-06-12T15:57:17","modified_gmt":"2015-06-12T20:57:17","slug":"the-terror-of-becoming-insanely-average","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hectic-dad.com\/hectic-dad\/the-terror-of-becoming-insanely-average\/","title":{"rendered":"The Terror of Becoming Insanely Average"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Steve<\/a>I’m a huge fan of Steve Jobs. I’ve written about him<\/a> before<\/a>. I don’t\u00a0exactly<\/em> have him on a pedestal…I realize that he had faults, just like everybody else. But there are aspects of what he\u00a0accomplished<\/em> that speak to me. Several of his catchphrases surface in my words. One that arises amongst members of the Hectic Family is “insanely great”. We’ve used it to describe how we want to be viewed, and how we achieve goals. It’s a fairly common…a member of the family sets out on an adventure, and another one\u00a0asks how they’re going to “exceed our expectations”. It’s our way of asking how the results will be “insanely great”.<\/p>\n

Recently I \u00a0was thinking about the idea of being\u00a0insanely great<\/em>. A lot of other things were bouncing around in my head, but I kept gravitating back to this idea. I then asked myself the question: Am I being\u00a0insanely great<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n

I concluded\u00a0I’m not. I listed\u00a0lots of reason: Time, responsibilities, energy levels. You name it, I brought it out, shook off the dust, and examined\u00a0the reasons<\/em>\u00a0in the light of day. In the end, I realized they were excuses<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

I dug deeper to understand why I was making excuses. For several hours, I thought about what was going on. I realized I’m not only failing to achieve\u00a0insanely great<\/em> status, but if I don’t shake things up I’m going to end up something much worse. I’ll be:<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Insanely Average<\/strong><\/h2>\n

That scared me. A lot. I’ve always been an over-achiever. In school I was always at the top of\u00a0the class. I took a job in a competitive field and rose rapidly through the ranks. I set out from that job and had a pretty good run as a solopreneur<\/em> when that word was still 20 years from being coined.<\/p>\n

We\u00a0started a family and I did a good job of raising the kids. Because of my wife’s\u00a0demanding schedule, I adapted my lifestyle to be the primary caregiver, transportation, and cheerleader for the kids. Along the way, we everything with gusto. We continually asked each other “how did you exceed expectations today?”. Leaving out\u00a0whose expectations they were…the idea was (and still is) to exceed someone’s<\/em> expectations. Especially\u00a0your own.<\/p>\n

Somewhere along the line, the family stopped asking that question of me. It’s frightening to realize that I even stopped asking the question of myself. For years I’ve barely been meeting my own expectations. It seems nobody has expectations for me. I’m just\u00a0support<\/em> for everybody else. I do what’s necessary, but it’s been a long time since I’ve had sufficiently high expectations that anyone would bother to ask how\u00a0I’m doing<\/em>. The only time it ever comes up is when I fail. Forgetting to pick up a kid after school, missing a bill payment, failing\u00a0to deliver something, returning library books late, letting the family run out of milk. Failing at the lowest common denominator of expectations will lead to a mini-revolt in the Hectic Family. Yet even then, someone will state\u00a0“Dad has a lot of things on his plate”.<\/p>\n

It’s an excuse…not a reason!<\/strong><\/p>\n

The worst thing about that excuse…it clearly shows how low the bar has been set. Honestly, do you know\u00a0anybody<\/em> who doesn’t have a lot of things on there plate? Do you know anybody who isn’t busy? It’s like saying “he’s breathing”. Everybody<\/em> has a lot on their plates. Maybe it’s silly stuff that shouldn’t be there. Maybe it’s the kind of activities that take a lot of time, but don’t generate results. In the end, our plates are full and we’re\u00a0all busy<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Being busy means I’m average. Extra-ordinary. When I\u00a0came to that realization,\u00a0it scared me. It shook\u00a0me to my core.<\/p>\n

I don’t want to be insanely average.<\/strong><\/p>\n

My biggest fear would be to see this on my headstone:<\/p>\n

\"Scary<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Fear can do two things, it can cause you to freeze or it can motivate you to move. Naming this fear has provided\u00a0motivation to move from where I am. I realize, there have been a lot of wins lately, but I also know that I’m not setting the bar high enough. In fact, I’ve let everybody else ratchet the bar so low that\u00a0anybody<\/em> can clear it. Yet I’m not\u00a0anybody<\/em>. I’ve got gifts and talents that I’ve allowed to languish. Everyday tasks and activities have become all I accomplish. I haven’t managed to really push past the routine of daily living. Like the proverbial hamster on a wheel, I’m spinning in place but going nowhere.<\/p>\n

I don’t want to continue to exist in the realm of\u00a0extra-ordinary<\/em>, I want to be\u00a0extraordinary<\/em>. I want to have high expectations for myself and then go beyond them. I want those around me to expect a lot from me, and then stun them<\/strong> with my ability to\u00a0exceed their expectations<\/em>.<\/p>\n

It’s not just about\u00a0wanting<\/em> though. It’s about\u00a0doing<\/em>. The next ten days are going to be our usual whirlwind of local activities, medium distance travel (at least for the Midwest US), and a combination airline flight-drive. School is getting near the end of the year, so our schedules are absolutely crazy. There is practically no routine\u00a0one day to the next. But that’s our lives. We’ve made our choices, now it’s time to fit everything that I want to accomplish into the spaces.<\/p>\n

Over the next ten days I’m embarking on a journey to exceed my own expectations. I’m going to seize\u00a0the opportunity of my hectic life to transform my expectations of myself into something greater. Something worth being remembered for.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0Something Insanely\u00a0Great!<\/strong><\/h2>\n
<\/div>\n

\"The<\/a> \"Brilliant<\/a> \"Super<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m a huge fan of Steve Jobs. I’ve written about him before. I don’t\u00a0exactly have him on a pedestal…I realize that he had faults, just like everybody else. But there are aspects of what he\u00a0accomplished that speak to me. Several of his catchphrases surface in my words. One that arises amongst members of the Hectic […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2334,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"The Terror of Becoming Insanely Average. 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